Because of you... I am

To all of you mothers out there, Happy Mother's Day to you! I hope your day is special in whatever way you choose to celebrate. Many of you are mothers now, soon to be mothers, and some of you have children that have gone to Heaven before you. There are also many mothers out there who have made the sacrifice so that mothers like me, could be mothers. I truly don't just think of my birthmoms on Mother's Day but each time I kiss my children goodnight, or become lost in all the memories of them growing up, and in my prayers for all that I have been given.

I will begin with my mom who none of this would be possible had she not given birth to me. I had an older sister and younger brother. We are all a year apart so I can only imagine how busy she was. I have heard it said both ways that the middle child has the most trouble or that they are the most adjusted. Well, in my mind my sister and brother were perfect so why should I follow that same path, right. Unfortunately for my mom I made the rule/or changed the rules as I went along. Now that I am a mother I can't imagine the sleepless nights she had or the many rosaries said on my behalf. I want to thank her for all the understanding and patience that she extended to me. I love you momma, you are the best!

This is for Tammy who almost 29 years ago, on her birthday gave birth to my son. Wow, how hard this was to place her first son into my arms anyway, but on her birthday, what a sacrifice! What an answer to my prayers. I had been told that I would not bear children and all I had ever heard was adoption was almost impossible. But God placed Tammy in the care of my family physician to deliver her baby. He had told me I would never conceive but not to worry for he knew that I would be a mother. I remember the afternoon that he called and asked if we were ready to adopt. My beautiful, blond first born son was born two weeks later. I had become a mother and I owe so much to Tammy.

To Denise, who just shy of 26 years ago gave birth to my first daughter. This was also her first and only daughter and she made the sacrifice and trusted me to raise her daughter. Tara is beautiful with her red hair and fair skin. I was so thankful and I remember the call that came in the wee hours of the morning (2 a.m.) that told me our little girl was born. Since I had a son I secretly yearned for a little girl. For all I knew this would be all of my children. Of course, I couldn't sleep so I began stitching pink on everything I could. I had my little girl and for this I owe so much to Denise.

To Karen, who 22 years ago gave birth to my tiniest child yet. Tyler was born 8 weeks early and his birthmother was considering placing him for adoption but wanted to meet and choose his family. We were so lucky to be asked to drive to meet her, and upon leaving she asked did I want to hold my new son. He is my soldier, my tallest child. He was so frail when we brought him home and it was Christmas time. I truly sat/rocked and marveled at how I had been blessed and couldn't imagine anything more. I had my 3rd and what I thought would be my last child and for this I owed Karen so much.

To Melissa, who made the choice 17 years ago to place her twins for adoption. It doesn't matter if it is one or two, you give your heart away. Two tiny, blond, pink little girls came into our home. Carly and Colette were full of life from the time they were born. On our worst day, they could make us forget all of our troubles. Wow, five children and I couldn't have felt more complete and so blessed. Our house was busy with children and that was all I had ever dreamed my life to be. They will soon be leaving for college and I can't imagine the silence that I will be feeling when they go. Thank you Jesus, for my Double Blessings!

Again, I am reminded that I am not in control. God is in control and know the plans He has for us. This would have been the time that life would become a little more free, time to slow down, to adjust to the empty nest...but that was not to be.

To Amanda, a little more than 5 years ago who place her little girl for adoption. She made the sacrifice to place her little girl who she believed was healthy with a young family who would be experiencing parenting for their first time ever. What she didn't know was that her little girl would be born with Trisomy 18. This is our little girl Annabel, who was born first to Amanda, then placed with Karen and Chris at the hospital who loved her very much. We were all told her life would be very short and tragic and the decision was made for her to be returned to the agency. For whatever Gods plans are, she is our daughter, He continues to bless her days, and she is loved by so many!

So to everyone single one of you, my mom, my birthmothers, step-moms, fostermoms Happy Mother's Day to you!

Two blondies...

Colette and Carly... HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!!

Unbelievable! Seventeen years ago yesterday these two tiny babies came into our lives. Having twins has its hard times but the GREAT times outweigh the bad. They are so close to each other and makes me so proud. I know you have heard me say it before, but I do believe I am so blessed and lucky to be their moms! This year is their Senior year and I know it will pass all too fast. In a blink of an eye we will be attending their high school graduation. Just remember girls we love you so much! I know everyone has heard the saying about twins being double trouble. Well I never once believed it, because ours were truly double blessings. I could not have had these two beautiful girls if it were not for the sacrifice that their birthparents made that very emotional day 17 years ago. I love them and thank them so much!

A very quick note to say that Annabel has had a good two days. She seems to have more energy and happy overall. She finish one antibiotic and the second will be done in about 2 more days. So maybe all this was tummy ache from the medicines. I am praying...

Our Christmas Eve...

As I sit and watch the slide show of my precious family, I am reminded that God is totally in control of our lives. Twenty nine years ago as I was struggling with infertility and not being about to conceive, I could never have imagined the goodness that He had in store. No my life is not totally perfect in every way, but the blessings are HUGE! Six children I could not love more. They are beautiful, handsome and so darn cute. We have our normal ups and downs but they love so much!
As I watched the slide show I can read in all their faces how much love they have for Annabel. I could not ask more of my children in anyway.
My parents, sister and brother I am sure thought I was crazy when I was determined to raise another baby so late in life. I know that each one guarded their hearts so none would hurt when she passed early like we were told. But I am sure, this Christmas of the love and acceptance in all their faces. How Annabel loves them all.
I love my mom and dad so much for giving me the gift of love! I am so grateful for my sister and brother and their families.
As I count my blessing of my family, I also count them of my friends that are close and some that are so far away. Some I have met and other I have never met but feel I know so much! I continue to thank you for all the prayers offered up on Annabel's behalf, in her sickness and her health. Merry Christmas to all!